The apostles are almost comical in their
frequent bewilderment concerning Jesus. Clearly, they never met anyone
remotely like him before. The way he looks at things is so original
and surprising. He’s a genius in the way that he speaks to the heart of things
in the disarmingly simple stories that he tells. Most significantly, the apostles
see in him a truly compassionate and free person. Everywhere he goes, he
brings hope and healing to the downtrodden. The spirit that he’s got,
they want. It’s exhilarating.
At the same time, he scares the hell out of
them. They notice that he sparks resistance and hatred from the powerful
who find him to be dangerously subversive. Jesus knows what the
authorities can, and almost certainly will, do to him – and yet he
persists. He challenges them to their faces. The apostles wonder how a
person can be so fearless. The courage he’s got, they want. But
it’s more than a little terrifying.
The apostles falter, sometimes spectacularly, in
their adherence to his way. Many times Jesus says to them something that
he must often tell himself in his quiet moments, “Do not be afraid.”
We Christians struggle, as the early disciples
did, to understand and emulate his courageous ways. We often don’t
measure up. Standing up for the poor, confronting oppressive structures,
and opposing unjust laws and practices can take a Christ-like bravery. It’s
daunting.
Courage is not always listed at the top of
virtues to which Christians aspire. Maybe it should be.
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